Holiday seasons are notorious for being stress-inducing months of full calendars, toxic messages, and lots of pressure to be perfect. Today, I want to share a few tips for managing stress during the holidays, and hopefully these strategies can help you experience a much calmer, more enjoyable season.
1) Know your boundaries (and the power of “no”)
This time of year, there are a lot of messages out there telling us that we need to do it all. But the reality is that we cannot do everything, and it’s important to listen to ourselves and what we need to feel balanced. Before taking on too much, remember that saying “no” is a valid response, and you are not required to give a reason. Protect your boundaries, your schedule, and your space. (And while we may not be pulled in as many directions during this year of social distancing, it’s still important to know how many Zoom calls is too many! Know your limits and honor them.)
2) Keep away from the diet programs
The diet industry really ramps up their game this time of year, and so it may take some extra intentionality to stay away from those messages. Unfollow, turn off, disregard—and keep yourself surrounded by people who promote a more balanced, intuitive, nourishing framework instead.
3) Practice self-compassion
Overeating and eating more of what you may not typically eat is a pretty natural occurrence during the holidays. If this happens, don’t stress. This does not impact your self-worth, your ability to be healthy, or your long-term desires for your body or overall health. Repeat after me: “I am the same me regardless of how much or little I eat.”
4) Skip the overcompensating
Pay attention to phrases like “I’m gonna need to run an extra mile tomorrow after all this food” or “I deserve to eat this because I didn’t eat very much earlier today/this week.” Challenge that toxic messaging, and instead, trust the fluidity of your process. Remember that the things we enjoy are not things we need to “earn.”
5) Play!
To me, one of the best reminders of this season is the beauty of play. The holidays don’t have to be a stressful time—in fact, they can be a time full of lightness, fun, and childlike wonder! Let yourself fully embrace the glee you may feel over holiday lights. Embrace the joy of hot chocolate with marshmallows. Dance around the room to your favorite holiday song. Laugh, love, and play!
6) Stick with your go-to strategies (but don’t stress about them)
Does running make you feel like you’re in a better head space? Do you respond well to a hot bath, listening to music, or whipping up a delicious meal? Remember that with all the things that may pull you in different directions this time of year, it’s important to be intentional about sticking with what you know works for you and your stress management. Don't stress about them—just do what you can to ensure you’re taking care of your needs.
7) Honor all the feelings
This time of year is often a mixed bag of emotions—we’re told that it’s the happiest time (and certainly embrace that if it is for you!), but often, we may also feel sadness, grief, nostalgia, loneliness, anxiety…all of it is natural to experience always, and especially during such an emotionally-charged time (and even more so this year!). Remember that you do not need to feel a certain way during the holidays, and whatever comes up for you is valid. Don’t put pressure on yourself to only feel certain things this time of year (or any time).
8) Know your support system
You don’t have to handle it all on your own! Even though this year in particular has made it challenging to stay connected, it’s important that we identify the supports in our lives and use them when we need. This could be family, friends, an online buddy, therapist, nutritionist, or other healing practitioner. Take note of who those people are and make a plan to stay connected with them during this season of life.
9) Have compassion for others
It can be so easy to get wrapped up in our own individual holiday experiences that we can forget about those around us. Instead of the holiday season representing a time of stress, overspending, and busy schedules, it can instead be a time of year to check in with ourselves and ask what roles we’re taking on in our communities. Taking action to love those around us and help build a more just world is something that can be done all year round, and now is a great time to see what actions we can take to do that!
10) Remember that perfection doesn’t exist
Although this is a special time for many of us, putting pressure on ourselves to make it “perfect” is unnecessary and takes away the enjoyment of it. As important as the holidays can feel, they will come and go—it’s really just another time of year, and it doesn’t need to be any certain way. No one “wins” the holidays… just do what you can to enjoy it as much as possible, honor all the feelings that may come up, and trust that come January 1st, you’re still your same amazing self, no matter how the month before may have looked.
And if you’re looking for some therapeutic support to get you through the holidays, head over to www.alyssamcleantherapy.com to learn more about my therapy services!